Saturday, January 5, 2008
For a change, I won't impersonate Vanu in this one post
More than three weeks have passed since I dropped Vanu off to Sirsa. Meanwhile, I've been shuttling work & home between Gurgaon & Jaipur. I've been missing Vanu like anything. I see her albums every day (difficult to count how many times every day) & she's at the back of my mind through out day (& night - For whatever reasons, I get dreams almost every night ever since I turned 10, Vanu has featured in a lot of them off late)
To make things worse, the train service has been cancelled for January due to fog & poor visibility. I'm now in a fix as to how to bring Vanu back. A 10 hour long bus journey is not a feasible proposition while my in-laws are really apprehensive about me driving down to Sirsa. I slept at 10 in the night on new year's eve, never felt like going out with friends or watching TV, spent a lot of time imagining how I would spend New Year's Eve with Vanu the next time around.
I miss the warmth of carrying her in my arms, her sleeping on my shoulder, changing her nappies, everthing that she did :). I call Jyoti every day to know how her day went. Meanwhile, Vanu keeps everybody busy & entertained at her Nani's place in Sirsa.
I now realize how much I've changed after Vanisha was born & more so after she's been away for a few days. I've always loved & respected my parents a lot. Now that I'm a father myself, I understand what they feel for me and I respect them even more. I value relationships more than anything else in my life and I don't have words to describe the bond that I share with Vanu.
Perhaps, the more I write about it, the more I'll feel sad about it. So, I'll just wrap this up hoping that I meet Vanu soon.
Vanu, Daddy loves you & misses you a lot !!
Hugs & Kisses from Daddy